No, really, that’s what it says in the headline to this story, written by Vivian Song for Sun Media, in which I’m one of several theorists quoted in an in-depth examination of the latest scientific thinking regarding the amazing feats of Jolly Old Saint Nick.
This appeared in the Winnipeg Sun, but it’ll probably be showing up in other Sun Media papers around the country.
(UPDATE: I’ve now found links to the same story in the Toronto Sun, St. Catharine’s Standard, 24 Hours Vancouver, the Sarnia Observer, the Edmonton Sun, the Calgary Sun, the Ottawa Sun, and, oddest of all, the Vancouver Quadra Conservatives website. Not bad!)
A tidbit (I’m quoted again later in the story):
Science fiction writer Edward Willett of Saskatchewan theorizes that the reindeer are actually genetically-engineered, mutant creatures with aerodynamically designed antlers and internal methane gasbags which allow them to fly.
Willett, who calls himself and fellow Santa students “clausotechnolometrists” also says he can easily explain ol’ Saint Nick’s ability to slide down the chimney.
The answer lies in his technologically superior red suit, Willett says, which is made up of a slippery Teflon-like synthetic that enables him to chute down the chimney with ease.
I was quoted because of my long-standing interest in this field of research, as you can see in my columns “The Science of Flying Reindeer,” “Rudolph the Reindeerigible,” and “The Technology of Santa.”